上司認為我進步慢，我卻認為位置發揮有限；上司認為我資歷淺，我卻認為我的經驗在這裡用不著，能力也未能發揮；上司認為我意識不強，我卻認為他的指引不清，溝通有問題；上司或許覺得我欠進取心，我卻想跟他講由day one開始已要跟進一堆投資/研究範圍外的行政文書工作，被那些例行公事磨得石頭也變成卵石了。
這幾個星期上班實在苦悶。
在下有一位朋友，她是以前還在投資銀行工作時認識的，她這兩年工作換得頗頻密，由投資銀行換到國際性律師事務所再回到投資銀行業，每次見到她總會埋怨工作忙碌，人被堆積如山的項目壓得快要窒息，想要辭職放假玩上幾星期。我當時哪會相信，誰知此君言出必行，很瀟灑、很有型。
若男生這樣做會被視作任性、欠責任感、受不了苦等等，再加上大部份男生都是家庭經濟支柱，所以大多數人都還要咬緊牙關苦幹下去，就是那一句說話把男人推向牆角：大丈夫能屈能伸…
我工作有多空閒，路人皆見(路過的同事)。同部門但不同項目的主管今天中午也打趣叫我過去幫忙，說笑也好當真也好，鬱鬱不得志的樣子可能很明顯吧，我也管不了，反正我已盡了力，是那些二、三、四線市場不濟不吸引了，我也沒辦法。但我的能力未有發揮卻是事實，什麼普通話、上海話等語言統通用不上；在這裡工作也不需要與外界的專業隊伍有交流，所以協調及溝通技巧也可放在抽屜裡；連在投行裡很重要的人際及生意網絡在這裡也不被重視。也不是說上司待我不好，只是mismatch，一開始便因誤會而結合。
我著實想學學那位朋友，放一個悠長假期讓自己去思考未來的路，做一些自己一直想做的事，旅遊、到鄉村建學校都可以。與她的情況很不同，分別在於她是忙得透不過氣，我卻是閒得發慌，對工作前景感到氣餒。如果不是快要結婚…唉。
上次annual dinner排練話劇時遇到的爭拗(看前文《Try me!》)只是催化劑，不是想走的主因。
真想揹起背包，到一些非熱門旅遊點走走。
我真會造夢呵！
摘自《笨小孩》一曲
哎喲往著胸口拍一拍呀 勇敢站起來 不用心情太壞
哎喲向著天空拜一拜呀 別想不開 老天自有安排
在自我安慰麼？不是，有些事有些夢想需要堅持的。
8 則留言:
每個人在工作要的東西不同吧
有人要錢 有人要地位 有人要尊重 有人要能一發所長 有人要有自尊 總之每個人要的工作價值和成就感不同
我也覺得我的工作有時缺乏挑戰
許多時候就算有想做的理想和抱負 卻也因整個大環境不允許 或是營運的問題而導致不能實現..最慘就是 我想實現我覺得對病人好的事 我的主管是看起來接受 其實並不真 我想實現我覺得對病人好的事 我的主管是看起來接受 其實並不真正認同 你會覺得盡力了確還是無工作成就感
我們都是在團隊工作的 我學會團隊中溝通很很重要
有時 if i learnt to communicate better, if i was a bit more patience and bit more understanding and try to present to my boss the importance of the situation, i guess i can somehow change her/ his biasis.. but yes, it does takes time and great effort..最後我學會去看我得出發心
when i was low..我當初為什麼要做OT..不就是為了我的興趣 和那群可愛的孩子嗎..when i rethink about my initiative.. 我覺得我現在應該可以忍受我的situation... i will everyone are different... you need to find your own reasons!! but yeah.. if you really think it's mismatch.. then... have a break bah..放長假是讓自己有時間休息 好好想想自己的定位
重新再出發囉
To Alice,
我相信在情緒、心理上都需要一個break，使我得以重新思考大方向、未來及人生。下星期便是工作5周年了，應該是時候來一個回顧了。
我在金融業工作，是因為undergrad、postgrad都是唸finance，而且我以為這也是我的興趣。哪知道我原來對這一門科目的興趣原來不怎麼熱誠，人也不想學習，沒有幹勁考那些專業試。這個是現實，不能自己騙自己。繼續下去也是浪費光陰，將心內原本不紅的火也吹熄掉。
人的理想及想像空間原是無限大，你要當太空人嗎？一轉念間，思海已將你帶到月球了。你要當首富或國家元首嗎？你會知道如何運用及分配財產、時間及權力嗎？哪時候也得要計劃一番。很多人看到這裡大概會很不以為然，無論怎樣也要面對現實，造夢無益。
就是這種態度扼殺了人的想像空間，很多人的理想抱負及興趣都是與不大賺到錢的，因要糊口養家，就得要繼續做一些違自己意願的工作，幸苦掙錢養大兒女後，又寄望他們好好讀書，進大公做高層拿高薪。他們的理想及宏願也不管了，就是想他們可以出人頭地，幫為五斗米折腰的父母掙回一口氣，也為他們未來生活著想。
這就是循環，這就是一般家庭的潛規。
我就是愛想東想西，我就是會不按章工作，我就是喜歡想不現實的事，這亦是博客名稱的由來「幻想曲」。
Frank
I fully support your decision. In fact over the past 1-2 yrs I've got some friends who changed their career path completely.
One was working in pharmaceutical field for 10 years in HK, and suddenly decided to go to Switzerland to study hotel management. He's now having his internship in Thailand.
The other one was also working in pharmaceutical for a few years but now working in Philips Securities (not sure what he does but he told me his salary was decreased by more than half.
My first friend is enjoying his new job very much while my second friend starts to doubt if he's made the right decision. The point I wanna make is, don't bound yourself into this 世俗眼光, that men should not be doing this and that. Bottomline, you've gotta have enough money to support yourself for whatever you do. Don't let your family worry about what you do...That's what I think at least.
我也要跟你拿版權費! The bill will be delivered to your office shortly!
但我想跟你講,聽聞本行的花紅是分期出的(目前還是空等中),恐怕會拖垮我的大計!
When you have lost your passion in a job, it's near the end of your relationship with that company/department. This is exactly what I've found in my last post in previous bank. It's really sad that the job actually occupied most of our time in life, and if you are not enjoying the work, it actually ruined your mood not only during the working time, but also the leisure time.
I think a way out is a good solution, just like me now, I feel much more happy than I was in 4 months ago. Not meaning the current job is a perfect job or there are no problems, but at least, I feel comfort and willing to go to work.
Take your time and think about it, action if possible.
For sure, I don't mean to advice you quit the current one without getting another better one la. What I mean is to keep your eyes open for opportunities, I think this is essential for us.
To i've,
對不起，文中我又無quote名，妳點開我單?有咩依郁我實請白鴿黨啲大狀告番妳轉頭。
To Fagu and veron,
You are right, only the next job matters. Wonder I am jumping into another volcano. If I have a choice, a getaway for myself only is very desirable at the current stage.
To all,
Why only girls leave comments??
No male readers today??
Or male readers share a different view with me/us?
Frank
Frank
I do agree with Farah!! 但說老實話 我也換過幾份工作 我後來發現你在這個地方的問題其實在別家公司也會發生 !!當然公司合適不合適有差別, 但調整自己的心態 和態度 和熱情也很重要!! 因為每家類似的公司都會遇到相同的問題!!如果太negative會吸引negative 得事喔~ 所以請努力變positive then you'll likely to attract positive things.
至於 養家當然重要~但是 還是可以兼顧養家和興趣的~只是剛開始要辛苦一點~但是我還是看到許多人成功兼顧興趣和養家餬口
你可以take short break! 重新看看到底甚麼才真正適合你 ~反正你又還未有小孩 ~小倆口還不會真正花太多錢~可以趁這時候好好規劃甚麼是你想做得 可以做長久的又可以讓家人過不錯的生活~但是要很努力去實現~這也是我現在想思考得~雖沒有家累 但我也想change career 最近一直在想有沒有其他我也有興趣 而且知道我會做得不錯的(有些工作要天份真的)又可以將來support 我的家庭(我想有點遠)but i think it's worthwhile planning..重要就是 不要不變 有問題困擾你 就開始改變吧
和你的同事(male)多聊聊囉 ~小女子 只是小女子淺見啦~加油
no need to have male leaving message to you la. You seem to have a wonderful time to chat with all the ladies here, hoho.
sometimes, decision is not hard to make if we know what we really want, all we need is "courage" to execute.
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